What to do with kids who puke

Four kids.  Two adults.

When the stomach virus takes out its first victim in our house, imagine a scene out of a submarine war movie.  Red lights flashing.  Military big dog walking around barking orders.  War is declared. That's what our house is like.

It's me against the germs.

Except...I'm not a bad-butt general.  Imagine the war-movie scene but the main character is a woman in yoga pants who looks a little green herself.  If one of my neighbors has lice, my head gets itchy.  As soon as one of my kids barf, my stomach feels like someone is inside it burning trash.

I'm sure there are many stomach virus pros out there who can throw up some valuable tips to get through the gag-nasties without selling your kids to the soupus, or running off and joining it yourself.

Doctors are great...and we know a great one (Amazing Doctor Bacak, 776-5191), but what's in this post, and hopefully in the comment section is not what you'll hear at the doctor's office. Doctors try to keep your kids from dying. This post is to keep moms from crying.

Since no one usually volunteers to come over and help a mom whose kids are puking (and who could blame them), I have found it's important to have a plan and be prepared if you're parenting alone with sick-o's.

My husband is a worship leader.  Ironically my kids "conveniently" get a stomach virus on the weekends so that I'm left alone with them. I'm sitting here trying to remember when my kids have ever had a stomach virus on a weekday, and I honestly can't remember that happening. So...all this stuff might seem crazy and over the top to most of you, but please keep in mind that it's usually little green-faced me...alone...with several children who are erupting from every end.

When the stomach virus hits our house, here are some pretty common things that immediately start going on around here:

1. I am instantly adored by my husband. Seriously. I never feel more loved or appreciated than when my kids are puking their guts up. Aaron will be the first one to admit that he is a wimp when it comes to vomit. Really. If a child starts throwing up, Aaron runs for his life. When our kids are little, I won't even allow Aaron to hold them when they are sick because I know for sure, no matter how good of a dad Aaron normally is, if a child started throwing up while being held, Aaron would not hesitate before throwing that child across the room. To add to the child launching, Aaron would also be screaming like a lady, dancing around saying, "It's on me, it's on me!" I'm not making any of this up. I've witnessed this with my own eyes. So, as soon as my children start ejecting their stomach contents, Aaron stands far away in the house and says things like, "I love you, Heather. You're the best wife ever. I love you so much." When the kids start upchucking, I morph into a superhero. This is not exactly what I wanted my superpower to be, but whatever...I'll take it.

2. I cover everything in the house with blankets and towels (don't even bother using sheets). Unfortunately the toilet is not my children's preferred place to puke. Actually, the last time Ashton was sick, he chose to throw up on a Sponge Bob Puzzle and on my shoes. Nice. After several stomach viruses, and after ruining several rugs and couches, I decided I needed to be a better steward of our belongings. It's sort of silly to ruin everything in your house over a stomach bug. In my younger years, after a few days of various family members throwing up, our house was so disgusting and so many items were ruined that I actually asked Aaron if we could move instead of clean the house and he paused...he actually took my suggestion into consideration, knowing it was quite possible that moving would be easier than putting our house back together. 

So...if kids are barfing, our house looks like Linens and Things took a dump inside it. Really. There's no better way to describe it. I wish there were a better way to describe it. And, I wish it wasn't getting more and more obvious that I live with all boys.  Blankets and towels cover everything. Couches, rugs, bookshelves...if it can't be soaked in the sink in bleach water...it has something covering it. It is so much easier to pick up a blanket, rinse it in the washing machine...and then wash it to death...than it is to stop and do major cleaning with a sick child waiting to be held or comforted.

Baby beds and pack in plays are about the worst places ever for a child to throw up. My kids have never gotten a stomach virus until they were past the age where you worry about blankets in the crib. So, I make sure everything is covered in the crib if that's where they are sleeping. I also pull it away from the wall. And word to your mother, I would never let a child who was throwing up sleep in a room with carpet that wasn't covered. Gag.

Also...even if your kids are so past burp rags, those things are still the best ever in my opinion. I get them out and keep them everywhere. If a child starts throwing up, you can grab one and wow...those things absorb a lot!


3. Deep containers are also sitting everywhere around the house when the stomach virus comes to visit. Make sure the containers are deep. Once, I had a shallow bowl sitting next to Hayden. He threw up in it, and the throw up bounced right back out...and all over him. I sat there thinking, "Wow...I'm so glad that now I not only have throw up all over the floor...I also have a child covered in it...and a bowl with throw up all over it. Good thing I'm such a genius."

4. My kids start doing orange juice shots. They love this. A doctor once told me that orange juice was better for kids when they are sick than apple juice. So, once an hour I give my kids orange juice in one of those tiny medicine cups. They only drink about 1-2 tablespoons at a time. They think the coolest thing ever is to drink out of those tiny cups. It's usually enough to keep them hydrated, but not enough to make them throw up. I'm not one of those freak out parents about sickness...but really, keeping little kids hydrated when they have a stomach virus is a big deal. Don't be too nonchalant about it. They are tiny, so they really do get dehydrated way faster than grown ups do. I also don't give my kids milk products until they haven't thrown up for over 24 hours. Two times, I gave a child milk too soon and they threw it up. I thought that was weird, since it had been many, many hours since they were sick...and had kept down other meals...but the doctor told me that sometimes kids become temporarily lactose intolerant when they are sick.

5. As soon as my child throws up, I put them in the bathtub while I clean up. I pick up the blanket...wash it. I use Clorox clean up and wipe down everything nearby. Clorox clean up will remove color from non-white things, but is great on my floors and in the bathroom for disinfecting. Then I immediately wash anything that needs washing in the washing machine on hot.

When I had lots of little kids it was hard to watch them and clean up a terrible throw up mess in the house.  I'd have to stick the non-sick kids in highchairs with a snack and put the baby in the baby bed. They might cry or fuss, but at least they were safe while I cleaned up a vomit mess and got the sick child clean and comforted.

6. I wash my hands every time I walk near water. I'm not a germ-a-phobe. I'm probably the opposite of that, as in, my kids hardly ever wash their hands (I'm not kidding), they play with other kids all the time, and lick each other (and other kids), yet are hardly ever sick. They do wash their hands after going to the bathroom...sometimes...and all the time when they go to a public bathroom...we have some rules! But man, the only thing worse than your kids throwing up is you throwing up while your kids are throwing up. So I wash my hands like I have OCD.

7. I try to keep the other kids away from the sick one. I said try. It doesn't always happen.  We put the sick child in one room in the bed with never ending movies and only let the sick kid throw up in one of the bathrooms that none of the other family members use.  After each throw up session in the bathroom I go all trigger happy with the Pine Sol and/or Clorox Clean up.

8. I don't put the sick kid in the car for any reason until it's been over 24 hours since they yacked. I know my limitations. If one of my kids threw up in the car, I would pull over and bawl. Thankfully we've only had one puke incident in the car. It was Ashton. He was in his car seat...and praise Jehovah, it all stayed inside his car seat...but even that was enough to make me blink back tears, and turn Aaron into Napolean Dynamite saying, "I can smell it. I can smell it."

9. I try...and it's hard...to find things to be thankful for even in the midst of the grossest situations ever.  I try to remember that I'm blessed to have a washing machine.  I'm blessed to have medical care. I'm blessed to be able to be home with my kids...not having to miss days of work to stay home with sick babies.  I'm blessed that it's just a stomach virus, their bodies are doing what God created them to do...get rid of the sickness and heal.  It will pass.  It could be way worse.

Moms...any other tips for young moms home with puking children?